leaping into the land of the unknown...

life has its twists and turns
and time and time again
no matter how many times i turn back and reflect
i am still always amazed...

how on earth did i get here?
how on earth my world turns out to be the way it is..
how on earth did i end up with all these things on my plate...

sometimes it is exhilaratingly too good to be true
sometimes it feels as if life has been rushing on top of me
sometimes it feels that life cannot be much more complicated...

with all the twists and turns,
i am still gratefully amazed,
that somehow,
i am here,
now.

that year by year,
with all the confusion, fear and depression,
comes always new beginnings,
new opportunities,
new challenges.

new reasons to be happy,
new reasons to be scared.

but time and time again,
leave me wondering,
how on earth do i deserve to experience all this?

and so,
as a thanksgiving to such a wonderful life,
let's live life to the fullest,
and making the best of what we've got.

b'coz, o boy....how lucky we are....

Happy New Year 2008

being beautiful is...

being beautiful is....

ah, difficult to describe...

one layer,

two layers,

three layers of face powder,

smoothening your face ....

expensive face powder,

famous branded treatment products.

being beautiful is....

difficult to feel...

when do you feel beautiful,

in the middle of life's restlessness,

life on the fast track...

are you feeling beautiful,

when you feel that you are racing against time?

close your eyes,

and see the ray shining from your heart,

the ray shining through from your sense of security.

the feeling of possessing all the beauty within yourself.

the feeling of being beautiful,

does not depend on how high you heels are,

how tight you pretty shirt is,

how expensive the lipstick adorning your smile is.

the feeling of being beautiful is,

within your heart,

the heart that believes,

that you are truly beautiful.

simply being you.

espresso

steaming hot espresso

seeping into my senses

warm fragrant of a near past

not distant

not far

and yet,

past already

the clinging of metal against tiny china cups

bringing together moments of laughter

and thoughts

and contemplation

and reminiscence

over cups of espresso

hot, steaming espresso

buka mata

buka mata,

dan tetap kau tak ada di sana...

buka mata,

dan tangan yang terulur hanya impian semata.

sesaat mengenangmu,

di atas segala perjalanan yang telah terurai...

dan berharap,

semoga semua yang terlalui

bukanlah mimpi buruk untukmu

buka mata,

dan berharap masih ada sisa-sisa rasa manis dalam kecutnya kenyataan.

buka mata,

dan berharap sejarah tak hilang.

tapi rupanya,

mungkin waktuku,

untuk buka mata.

bahwa bagimu....Mas,

aku benar-benar tinggal sejarah.

dan saatnya aku bangun dari mimpi...

dan buka mata.

kau,

takkan pernah jadi temanku lagi.

ah, buka mataku...

buka mata...

buka mata...

in love

as I was sitting all by myself,

and think,

and reflect,

and looking at who is there,

and who is not there.

then come a slow, and yet sudden,

realization....

that somehow...I'm in love.

I'm in love with life,

and what it has to offer.

I'm in love with the challenge,

difficulties, emotions,

fatigue...

and also its happiness,

and joy, and hopes...

and I'm in love with you.

with a sudden, calm, cool awareness

seeping into my brain.

I sat there and confessed.

oh yes, I think I'm in love with you,

still.

a funny feeling it is

to sit there all by myself

and feel the feeling of being in love,
calm,
and smooth.

such a strange realization,

that such a calm feeling can be associated with love.
red, hot, burning passionate love.

or maybe, this love is not that kind of love.

well, who cares...

and there I was, sitting there.

and not feeling the fire burning from within,

engufling me in such a longing,

and jealousy,

and disturbing fires of passion.

and feel safe, and secure...

and warm and confident...

that no matter what happens in the future,

that day,

I was calm and peaceful within myself,

knowing that....

hm....I love you...

the cool, strange, kind, funny, stupid, cute, silly, sporty, fussy, Bunny Guy....

this is for you.